By Fran Kick
Remember the first time you can recall actually being a leader? For most of us, the first experience of “being in charge” occurred when we were in elementary school. Many teachers would designate one person each day to be the “helping hand.” Usually every person in class got a turn at being this person. Their name would be written on the board somewhere. Perhaps a construction paper cut-out of their hand with their name on it would be prominently displayed for all to see and recognize that they were the class leader for that day.
Think of all the things you got to do if you were selected:
- You always got to be at the front of the line when walking to and from the classroom with your class.
- You were the one who got to leave class for special trips to the office (like bringing that day’s class attendance report to the office, taking a note to the school secretary, or delivering the lunch count to the cafeteria).
- You sometimes got to pick a friend to go with you on special errands for the teacher. This way you could bring your friends in on the adventure of getting more paper from the teacher’s supply closet. Perhaps even stopping for an extra drink of water from the water fountain on the way there and back.
- You would sometimes get to make the final decision whenever something would need to be decided for the entire class.
- You would be the “go to person” whenever anyone needed something or someone.
- You might even be responsible for picking your successor to be the “helping hand” for tomorrow.
The list could go on, depending on who you had for an elementary teacher, but many of the same lessons were learned at an early stage in our life about leadership, or more specifically about “being a leader.” It was all about YOU! Being selected, designated, recognized, always first or in front of others, being excused for special trips, errands, and responsibilities, getting to bring your friends in on it whenever you could, making the final decisions for others, being the person everyone went to and being publicly acknowledged as the leader.
“Leadership and its development in our students demands that we approach “learning leadership” in a more developmentally dovetailed manner.”
Hmmm… Perhaps that’s why so many people think of leadership in these same terms later on in life. After all, we tend to live what we learn early in life.
In fact, between early childhood and middle childhood we pass through a critically important developmental transition. During this – as well as subsequent developmental transitions – we’re increasingly sensitive to, and impacted by, the events and/or experiences in our life at that time. According to developmental scientists, transitional periods and associated events have the potential to impact behavior, influence cognition, and imprint a contextual frame of reference, which can last a lifetime. These are also referred to as “sensitive periods” when brain development opens a significant “window of opportunity” to learn. Pat Kuhl, a neuroscientist at the University of Washington states, “During sensitive periods environmental stimulation is highly effective in producing developmental change.” This has huge implications as to our understanding on how kids learn and grow as well as when and how the world influences that growth.
These developmental transitions, or sensitive periods, also occur as we move from one major period of value formation to the next:
- 0-7 years old – The imprint period – “Children see, children do”
- 7-12 years old – The modeling period -“I want to be like…”
- 12-18 years old – The socializing period – “Everybody else is doing it.”
- 18-25 years old – The integration period – “What and how am I going to do it?”
Our early experiences in peer group socialized settings, especially when it comes to leadership, may have a more lasting impact on our own ideas of what “being a leader” means in our mind than we’d care to admit. Leadership and its development in our students demands that we approach “learning leadership” in a more developmentally dovetailed manner. Students need to recognize the imprinted images that have been burned into their brains – both good and bad, positive and negative, constructive and destructive. They can learn much by making meaning from and deconstructing the models of leadership they’ve seen in their life, experienced first hand, and wanted to be like.
They say “wisdom is created by reflecting upon the experiences we have” and certainly this is true when it comes to leadership. In their book, Geeks & Geezers, Warren Bennis and Robert Thomas write: “The one key asset all leaders share, whether young or old, is their adaptive capacity. The ability to process new experiences, to find their meaning and to integrate them into one’s life, is the signature skill of leaders and, indeed, anyone who finds ways to live fully and well.”
Helping our students to see the leadership lessons in life might be the single most important responsibility we have today.
After all, we need students who can figure things out for themselves, pay attention, respond appropriately, put more into it so they can get more out of it. We need to focus on what they do want in a positive and constructive way rather than what they don’t want in a negative way, making things happen for themselves as well as the people around them.
“Students need to recognize the imprinted images that have been burned into their brains – both good and bad, positive and negative, constructive and destructive.”
As you begin to consider future leaders for your program, here are a few questions to ask in the interview or on the application that might help your students self-reflect a bit more broadly and deeply about leadership:
- Think back to the very first time you can recall being a leader. Describe the reason, the setting, the things you did, the lessons that now apply or don’t apply to your thoughts about leadership and being a leader.
- Identify one of the first members you looked up to in our program as a leader. Who was it?
What did he or she do that caused you to admire them as a leader? How did they help (or perhaps sometimes hurt) the program in their attempts to lead? What one lesson did you learn from their example that you hope to bring to life as a leader yourself? - When was one time you didn’t get sucked into the “everybody else is doing it” game? What were the circumstances involved? How did you keep from just going with the flow? What lessons did you learn from this situation that can apply to leadership?
- What do you see as the biggest challenge you’ll face as a leader? How do you believe you’ll deal with this challenge? What will you do in advance to set yourself up for success in light of this challenge?
- Upon graduating, what do you hope to gain by being a leader in our program? How will this help you later on in life?
These questions, and the others that they inspire you to ask, hopefully will bring some light not only to the students’ perspective on leadership in your program, but your own as well. We all need to learn lessons along the way.
Perhaps the most important thing we learned from our early elementary school days, is that ultimately leaders are “helping hands.” The goal is to continuously help our students increase the level of self awareness required to develop the personal leadership they need to KICK IT IN & TAKE THE LEAD!
FRAN KICK, educational consultant, author and certified speaking professional, is the creator and presenter of KICK IT IN a series of self-motivational personal leadership presentations and materials. Fran is Coordinator of BOA’s Leadership Weekend Experience.
- 0-7 years old – The imprint period – “Children see, children do”
- 7-12 years old – The modeling period -“I want to be like…”
- 12-18 years old – The socializing period – “Everybody else is doing it.”
- 18-25 years old – The integration period – “What and how am I going to do it?”
- Think back to the very first time you can recall being a leader. Describe the reason, the setting, the things you did, the lessons that now apply or don’t apply to your thoughts about leadership and being a leader.
- Identify one of the first members you looked up to in our program as a leader. Who was it? What did he or she do that caused you to admire them as a leader? How did they help (or perhaps sometimes hurt) the program in their attempts to lead? What one lesson did you learn from their example that you hope to bring to life as a leader yourself?
- When was one time you didn’t get sucked into the “everybody else is doing it” game? What were the circumstances involved? How did you keep from just going with the flow? What lessons did you learn from this situation that can apply to leadership?
- What do you see as the biggest challenge you’ll face as a leader? How do you believe you’ll deal with this challenge? What will you do in advance to set yourself up for success in light of this challenge?
- Upon graduating, what do you hope to gain by being a leader in our program? How will this help you later on in life?